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Young n old
Jun. 4th, 2015 12:46 pmHindsight is 20/20, so the wise proverb goes. Well I’m glad that something is, even if I’m not! Now that I’m officially over-the-hill, reaching for distance glasses when I drive and close-up glasses for projects, I find myself waxing philosophic.
I look back to the frustration of my youth. When I was a kid and young adult, I had a really hard time dealing with people older than me. Oh sure, in regular interactions things were fine – particularly when the older individual called the shots or when we agreed on something. But when we did not agree, that’s where the trouble began. I would try to state my reasoning for disagreeing, and inevitably be dismissed as being young and foolish, or naïve, or arrogant. Gods forbid that I actually had a point! Now fast-forward 20 or 30 years to today and I consider myself very much the same person in many ways that I was then. I have matured somewhat. I have learned that perhaps I don’t need to fight every single battle that I stumble across. But in the big picture, I think I am still in many ways the same person that I used to be with the same thoughts about the world and people and the ways that things should be done. What’s different? Now, when I say something, I am no longer quickly dismissed as being young and foolish, or naïve. And while for me personally, I find that refreshing, I just do not believe it is right or fair – particularly when I see the same thing happen to other people that I know who happen to be younger.
I think as people get older, it is somewhat natural to start feeling a sense of entitlement. It is part of that whole “Respect your elders” mentality that is taught somewhat universally. And in some ways, I think there is something to be said about that. Elders do, I believe, deserve some forms of inherent respect simply because they’ve been through more. They have more experience. They have seen more things. They have generally had to do things in a more difficult way. They have earned respect in that way. BUT, does this mean that elders have the right to quickly dismiss or shut down youth simply because they are a generation removed? I say, no.
Those who are younger, who display a precocious sense of logic and wisdom should not be dismissed just because they are younger. And it is a disservice to do so! Sure, younger people may be a bit clumsy or awkward compared to someone with more experience. They are still learning! But that doesn’t mean that they don’t deserve to be given time, audience, guidance, and on occasions either an ear or a shoulder or a pat on the back!
I look back over the span of decades, and remember being frustrated to the point where tears welled up in my eyes because I felt like I was practically screaming that I saw a fire out in the distance, and people around me dismissed me because I was young and foolish and naïve and arrogant. Fast-forward to now, and I can be in the same exact situation with a very similar group of people and say the exact same thing. But what is different? I have silver in my hair, wrinkles around my eyes, and it takes me a little bit longer to move around. Oh yah, and people LISTEN to me. For me, it feels nice. I finally feel like people take me seriously and appreciate what I have to say. It just sucks that it took this long.
I am not advocating that we throw “respect your elders” out the window. What I said above hasn’t changed. Elders DO have more time and experience than younger people. But does that mean that elders are always right or always know best? No. Does it mean that younger people can’t also have a good idea or a point or see danger where the elders do not? No.
Respect Each Other. I think THAT is what we need to all aim for. Please, one and all, let’s give that some thought.
I look back to the frustration of my youth. When I was a kid and young adult, I had a really hard time dealing with people older than me. Oh sure, in regular interactions things were fine – particularly when the older individual called the shots or when we agreed on something. But when we did not agree, that’s where the trouble began. I would try to state my reasoning for disagreeing, and inevitably be dismissed as being young and foolish, or naïve, or arrogant. Gods forbid that I actually had a point! Now fast-forward 20 or 30 years to today and I consider myself very much the same person in many ways that I was then. I have matured somewhat. I have learned that perhaps I don’t need to fight every single battle that I stumble across. But in the big picture, I think I am still in many ways the same person that I used to be with the same thoughts about the world and people and the ways that things should be done. What’s different? Now, when I say something, I am no longer quickly dismissed as being young and foolish, or naïve. And while for me personally, I find that refreshing, I just do not believe it is right or fair – particularly when I see the same thing happen to other people that I know who happen to be younger.
I think as people get older, it is somewhat natural to start feeling a sense of entitlement. It is part of that whole “Respect your elders” mentality that is taught somewhat universally. And in some ways, I think there is something to be said about that. Elders do, I believe, deserve some forms of inherent respect simply because they’ve been through more. They have more experience. They have seen more things. They have generally had to do things in a more difficult way. They have earned respect in that way. BUT, does this mean that elders have the right to quickly dismiss or shut down youth simply because they are a generation removed? I say, no.
Those who are younger, who display a precocious sense of logic and wisdom should not be dismissed just because they are younger. And it is a disservice to do so! Sure, younger people may be a bit clumsy or awkward compared to someone with more experience. They are still learning! But that doesn’t mean that they don’t deserve to be given time, audience, guidance, and on occasions either an ear or a shoulder or a pat on the back!
I look back over the span of decades, and remember being frustrated to the point where tears welled up in my eyes because I felt like I was practically screaming that I saw a fire out in the distance, and people around me dismissed me because I was young and foolish and naïve and arrogant. Fast-forward to now, and I can be in the same exact situation with a very similar group of people and say the exact same thing. But what is different? I have silver in my hair, wrinkles around my eyes, and it takes me a little bit longer to move around. Oh yah, and people LISTEN to me. For me, it feels nice. I finally feel like people take me seriously and appreciate what I have to say. It just sucks that it took this long.
I am not advocating that we throw “respect your elders” out the window. What I said above hasn’t changed. Elders DO have more time and experience than younger people. But does that mean that elders are always right or always know best? No. Does it mean that younger people can’t also have a good idea or a point or see danger where the elders do not? No.
Respect Each Other. I think THAT is what we need to all aim for. Please, one and all, let’s give that some thought.
