You KNOW you’ve all thought about it!

I have no doubt that somewhere in the world, God is going to kill a sweet, little kitten because I am thinking evil thoughts. But, but, but… I just can’t help it!

 

Scanning the paper this morning for some news OTHER than fires, economy, and the political battles on healthcare, I read about a 62 year old man that is being prosecuted for slapping a misbehaving two-year old. “Erugh?” I thought to myself. “THIS could be interesting.” Apparently, the man was in a store or a restaurant or somewhere, and this two-year old was acting up. Growing irritated, the man scowled at the woman he assumed to be the mother. She did nothing about the child’s temper tantrum. He eventually said to the woman that she needed to do something to quiet the kid down, or he would. She did nothing. So… he turned around and slapped the child while she stood there, dumbfounded.

 

I KNOW, I sound heartless.

I KNOW I sound mean.

NO, I would never do such a thing.

YES, I know better.

But…

 

…I LAUGHED MY ASS OFF!!!!!!!

 

Why? Because let’s face it folks, we’ve all thought about it. We’ve ALL thought about it. (And don’t EVEN say, “why, I NEVAH!” cuz I’ll call shenanegans!) How many times have we all been at a restaurant trying to enjoy a romantic moment only for it to be interrupted by baby in the corner loudly carrying on, throwing things, or shrieking in a pitch that only Mariah Carey could imitate? How many movie moments have been completely ruined because a child, who is too young to understand the movie and is completely bored, becomes whiney, squirmy, and loud while the clueless git of a parent chooses to tune out the child? I got news for you, clueless-git. Not only are you being incredibly rude and insensitive to your child – you are also being incredibly rude and insensitive to the people around you who paid for the privilege of seeing the movie without the added sound-effects of your child! We don’t share your ability to be able to tune out your child!

 

How many times have we all seen a parent with a pendulum so far over to one side as to be completely opposed to ANY type of discipline for fear of it scarring precious-widdle-poopsy-woopsy-prodegy? How many times have we all been in what is really an adult-centered occasion, place or activity only for a baby to be running around completely amuck with the parent acting as if he or she is on break?

 

Now, please don’t get me wrong. Parenting is no easy picnic, and I realize that. I have a tremendous amount of respect for people who surrender so much of their time, energy, patience, and lives towards raising the next generation. Truly I do. I’m not talking about good parents who raise good kids who, on occasion, act like children. All human beings have good days and bad days – adults and children alike. And parents have to pull double-duty, not only watching their own moods and behaviors, but also that of their kids. It only makes sense that kids will misbehave more than adults. They are, after all, kids. And MOST of the time when I have seen kids act up, I have seen the parents spring into action. There are, after all, few powers in the universe stronger or more powerful than “The Mom Voice!” Every now and again, you may see a kid act up, and the mom need do nothing more than to give the kid, “The Look”. Oooh, or maybe even invoking the kid’s middle name will cause the kid’s soul to tingle. And then, there is always the threat of a smack. A raised hand, or the mere mention of a paddle or a switch will frequently be enough to push the kid’s reset button.

 

Yes indeed, good parenting is the key to a good kid. But unfortunately, we don’t require people to pass an exam before procreating. And yes, there are a lot of kids out there allowed to run completely amuck while their clueless parents wander around the world as if their jobs ended with the birth. In such cases, I don’t dream about slapping the child. I dream about slapping the parent.

 

The 62 year old was out of line. He had absolutely NO business and NO right to strike the child of a stranger. I don’t blame him for being frustrated, but he was out of line. Not his kid, not his business. But at the same time, I would be fibbing if I didn’t admit that part of me giggled.

 

Hmmm… I bet the kid finally shut up!