The Forces of Morning

[storytimewithjoe]

Being dragged violently against my will from the darkly depths of nocturnal slumber, the ominously thick raincloud of morning doom loomed over my head as I climbed out of bed.  With my vision clouded by a swarm of hornets cleverly disguised as daylight, I donned my robe and stumbled down the perilously treacherous stairs, while the sharp and jagged slivers of daylight stabbed their way through the windows.

 

Sitting serenely and peacefully in the back parlor, my husband (aka The Morning Person) sang Disney tunes accompanied by the friendly animated pets of the forest.  To his left, a happy and smiling deer stood, singing merrily, and harmonizing in a rich tenor.  Over his head, blue birds of paradise gently flew, carrying garlands and banners bearing happy, happy, HAPPY messages of Good Morning in the many languages of the world.  While the stormcloud above my head continued to drench me in the cold and harshly wet reality of morningness, my husband wished me a good morning.  Of course, as the animated wish of happiness came out of his mouth, it grew and grew and grew until, hitting me smack dab full in the face, the larger than life message knocked me back until my head smacked against the floor.  Dizzily opening my eyes, little miniature bluebirds circled around my head in an animated, “Good MORNING!  Good MORNING!  Good MORNING!” only to end with the quick draw of a gun, a little smoke, and a few burned blue feathers floating wispily in the air.

 

OK, maybe this isn’t REALLY how my morning began – but that is how it feels sometimes.  I truly wish that I could be a morning person.  If I could adjust an internal dial, I would gladly do so.  But unfortunately, life just doesn’t work that way.  My body WANTS to stay awake until around 2:00, and sleep until around 10:00.  And because the corporate world seems to have bowed down to the completely unoriginal schedule of a farmer, I have to somehow make it work.  BLECH!

 

What makes a person either a night owl or a morning person?  Is it inherited?  Is it learned?  Nature, or nurture?

 

I remember as early as the First Grade, our teacher made a point one day of asking us each how much sleep we get the night before, specifically asking those kids who looked like they had dark circles under their eyes, betraying a restless night.  When one of the kids pointed out that I had dark circles, my teacher commented, “No, Joe is ok.  He always has dark circles under his eyes in the morning no matter how much sleep he has had.”  And thus, with one innocent comment, I was declared exempt from morning-functionality. 

 

Are you a morning person, or is morning something horrible that just happens to you?

Comments

[ptownnyc.livejournal.com]

Anything before 9:00 is pure torture. Therefore, every morning is pure torture.

[acdntlpoet.livejournal.com]

agreed. and recently I have had a slew of 6am or 7am conference calls to participate in. -blech-
My ONLY saving grace is that I work from home and only need to slog my way down the hall to get to work.
Still. Way. TOO. EARLY.

[ptownnyc.livejournal.com]

I worked from home for 8 years, and it wasn't so bad (aside from getting up early for client calls). Now I am in an office again, and this "get to work by 9" thing is just plain idiotic.

[madknits.livejournal.com]

I am a morning person. I wake up at 5 every morning.
I don't need caffeine to get going.
I'm chipper and chirpy and I sing.
OK, mostly Scottish ballads in a minor key, where everyone dies in the end, but still, I'm singing.

My dad was a morning person. My mum wasn't.
I don't know if it's nature or nurture.

[joeguppy.livejournal.com]

It is best that we are on opposite sides of the country. I'd have to kill you.

[ptownnyc.livejournal.com]

I agree with joeguppy. You come at me early in the morning like that, I'll find creative use for about ten dozen of your knitting needles.

[madknits.livejournal.com]

Over the years (and there have been so many of those), I've learned to ammeliorate my morning cheerfulness. So I don't inflict it on unsuspecting others first thing in the morning. I am kind enough to wait for them to have at least their first cup of coffee.

;-)

[joeguppy.livejournal.com]

OK, I will let you live. :-)

[aofe.livejournal.com]

Morning person here too--that part that sucks is that Ty is a night person. I like to have sex in the AM, he does not.

Can be an issue at times. We both like to wake each other up for sex. After that initial urge to punch someone, the sex can be quite good.

[joeguppy.livejournal.com]

Exception - waking me up for morning sex. That is allowable and earns a Get-Out-of-Death-Free card.

[cayswann.livejournal.com]

There's a reason I serve "Coffee Bar of Splendoor" at wars from 7 am until 10 am.... I have to keep all the happy animated woodland creatures quiet behind me, playing their happy morning games (quietly!! it's a contest! which of you can sing the quietest?!). Then while the woodland creatures are dancing over here in the corner, I'll tend the boiling water, brew you some coffee or hot tea or chocolate or spiced cider [whatever hot drink of choice you desire] and hand it to you calmly and quietly. Take as long as you need to sip your brew. We'll take on the day together later. And when I collapse at midnight or 1 am, you keep the party going on my behalf. I'll be well dressed and serving hot drinks again tomorrow. Stumble out at your will.

And if you need your coffee at 11am instead, I'll come back and brew a fresh pot for you then. Just ask my house- and camp-mates. I'll keep the singing blue birds safely out of your way. They can trill in my ears instead. *grin*

[joeguppy.livejournal.com]

You rock - all there is to it!

[slamson.livejournal.com]

Yes, that would certainly be a valued service!

I fight it.

[lifeofglamour.livejournal.com]

I'm a morning person, but not a happy one.

What I mean is, I naturally wake with the sun. I don't want to get up but my body insists. I do my best thinking in the morning - after 1 or 2 pm is not my best working hours. But I'm not cheerful or chipper about it. Once I'm up I appreciate the calm and quiet of the morning hours, but I hate that I can't sleep in. In fact, I can't sleep at all if the sun is up.

And, unless chemical intervention is attempted I will happily fall asleep by 10pm. Which is why I can't make it through most media in the evenings. Watch a movie on the couch? Great - I'll be asleep within a quarter of an hour...

Starting work at 8 AM is NOT a farmer's schedule

[slamson.livejournal.com]

I personally never started the day on the dairy later than 5 AM. That means waking up at 4:30 AM, dressing, grabbing some caffeine and a muffin, and walking down the road a quarter-mile while consuming said rations. As I am a morning person, that suited me quite well. My cousin, the dairyman's daughter, was NOT and purely hated to help so never did.

My father was raised on a farm, was career USAF, and was a morning person. Both he and the dairyman uncle thought that waking up between 6 and 7 was heavenly leisure, LOL.

Morning sex goooood. Yes, that has been an issue in my past as well as I am NOT a night owl. In case you can't tell from the above.

Joe's mornings

[(Anonymous)]

Unlike you, from the second I open my eyes I am awake! and hit the ground running.
You however have always been nocturnal. You'd regularly come home from school, take a nap and then begin homework at 8 pm. Heriditary, or dna, or just you.
Or is it, your nephew, who shares so many of your traits doesn't do mornings either.
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