VERY happy Wednesday
Jan. 16th, 2013 12:48 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
storytimewithjoeI’m in such an absolutely fantastic mood today that I could laugh, sing, cry, skip-down-the-hall and dance all at the same time.
Is it a holiday? No.
Is it my birthday? No.
Did I get a raise? No.
Did I win the lottery? No.
So what’s the deal? Simple. I Feel Good!
After months of being in pain and having absolutely NO energy, yesterday the clouds parted. I had a busy day at the office, and I felt good and productive. After work I raced home and was in a “charge ahead and take no prisoner!” mood. I ran around the house, cleaning and cooking and unpacking and preparing and organizing and making and, and, and, and… had boundless energy. I felt unstoppable and creative and in-control and absolutely thriving! Then ZOOOOM I went off to the local cooking guild meeting where I had a fantastic reunion with like-minded-geeks who enjoyed a fun night of fantastic food. Then back home I went to continue with a progressive night.
As a health update for those who have been following my trials and tribulations, after many doctor-visits and tests and blood draws and scopes and poking and prodding and consultation with experts, they were able to partially figure things out – what I have is NOT a chronic condition. Rather, it is a severe infection. Try though they might, they were never able to identify what kind of infection. They tested me for everything under the sun and finally just gave up. They may not be able to come up with a name for it, but they put me on heavy-duty antibiotics. And guess what – the drugs seem to be WORKING! And believe you me, I have had more than a few crying episodes out of sheer gratitude and appreciation. I am very, very, very, very lucky. For those people out there who have to suffer forms of colitis or chronic intestinal challenges, I sooooo feel for you. These past few months for me with pain and no energy have been hellish – probably one of the worst periods of my life. As bad as the pain was, I could have lived with that. But the severe fatigue was killing the very thing that makes me the person that I am. Knowing that it is not only ending, but potentially ending forever for me is like being reborn.
I HAVE learned a few things from this. When my body says, “Hey! I need REST you moron!” I will indeed make a point to rest. Non-productive time does NOT mean I’m a time-waster or a big-ol’-loser. Au contraire – it IS productive time. It is recharging my body that is flashing red and saying “you are at 20% battery capacity”. I have learned to chill. More importantly, I have learned that I am capable of chilling. I have learned to not be too hard on myself. I have learned that it is ok to just let some things go. I have learned that I can ask for help. I have learned that I have friends out there who are more than happy to lend a hand. No, I am not forgetting my husband here. He was an absolute saint and savior through this whole ordeal. I didn’t “learn” that I could rely on him. That part, I already knew. (I love you honey!)
I have often said, “there are no bad experiences in life – just opportunities to learn.” This experience, as absolutely horrible and miserable as it was, did indeed teach me some things. And I feel like I am a better and stronger person for it.
So slowly I am returning to life. This weekend we have one of my absolutely favorite events in store. And Sunday I return to a much-missed activity – visiting the gym.
Thank you to everybody out there who has been so supportive – lending a shoulder to cry on, holding my hand when I needed it, and showing so much caring – always and unfailingly. I feel like the luckiest and most fortunate person in the world.
So now, back to my mission for the day – feeling good!
Is it a holiday? No.
Is it my birthday? No.
Did I get a raise? No.
Did I win the lottery? No.
So what’s the deal? Simple. I Feel Good!
After months of being in pain and having absolutely NO energy, yesterday the clouds parted. I had a busy day at the office, and I felt good and productive. After work I raced home and was in a “charge ahead and take no prisoner!” mood. I ran around the house, cleaning and cooking and unpacking and preparing and organizing and making and, and, and, and… had boundless energy. I felt unstoppable and creative and in-control and absolutely thriving! Then ZOOOOM I went off to the local cooking guild meeting where I had a fantastic reunion with like-minded-geeks who enjoyed a fun night of fantastic food. Then back home I went to continue with a progressive night.
As a health update for those who have been following my trials and tribulations, after many doctor-visits and tests and blood draws and scopes and poking and prodding and consultation with experts, they were able to partially figure things out – what I have is NOT a chronic condition. Rather, it is a severe infection. Try though they might, they were never able to identify what kind of infection. They tested me for everything under the sun and finally just gave up. They may not be able to come up with a name for it, but they put me on heavy-duty antibiotics. And guess what – the drugs seem to be WORKING! And believe you me, I have had more than a few crying episodes out of sheer gratitude and appreciation. I am very, very, very, very lucky. For those people out there who have to suffer forms of colitis or chronic intestinal challenges, I sooooo feel for you. These past few months for me with pain and no energy have been hellish – probably one of the worst periods of my life. As bad as the pain was, I could have lived with that. But the severe fatigue was killing the very thing that makes me the person that I am. Knowing that it is not only ending, but potentially ending forever for me is like being reborn.
I HAVE learned a few things from this. When my body says, “Hey! I need REST you moron!” I will indeed make a point to rest. Non-productive time does NOT mean I’m a time-waster or a big-ol’-loser. Au contraire – it IS productive time. It is recharging my body that is flashing red and saying “you are at 20% battery capacity”. I have learned to chill. More importantly, I have learned that I am capable of chilling. I have learned to not be too hard on myself. I have learned that it is ok to just let some things go. I have learned that I can ask for help. I have learned that I have friends out there who are more than happy to lend a hand. No, I am not forgetting my husband here. He was an absolute saint and savior through this whole ordeal. I didn’t “learn” that I could rely on him. That part, I already knew. (I love you honey!)
I have often said, “there are no bad experiences in life – just opportunities to learn.” This experience, as absolutely horrible and miserable as it was, did indeed teach me some things. And I feel like I am a better and stronger person for it.
So slowly I am returning to life. This weekend we have one of my absolutely favorite events in store. And Sunday I return to a much-missed activity – visiting the gym.
Thank you to everybody out there who has been so supportive – lending a shoulder to cry on, holding my hand when I needed it, and showing so much caring – always and unfailingly. I feel like the luckiest and most fortunate person in the world.
So now, back to my mission for the day – feeling good!
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2013-01-16 08:58 pm (UTC)The creative side needs to recharge also. I remember reading on a writer's blog that after she finishes writing a novel, she has to take a break from writing to recharge her writer battery. I think a lot of creative pursuits need that. Downtime to contemplate what next
no subject
Date: 2013-01-16 09:16 pm (UTC)Excellent!
Date: 2013-01-16 09:46 pm (UTC)yay
Date: 2013-01-16 11:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-01-17 05:41 am (UTC)You need to listen to your body, and keep pushing the doctors until they listen to you and help you (it took me 3 years to finally solve my fatigue, so I feel for you).
I'm happy we have energetic Joe back!!
no subject
Date: 2013-01-17 03:09 pm (UTC)