Opinions are like….
Jan. 9th, 2017 12:35 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
storytimewithjoeI think it fair to say that as we look back upon 2016, many of us feel a sense of, oh I dunno… distaste? Nausea? Resentment? Anger? Division?
In addition to what seemed like an unbelievable number of celebrity deaths one right after another; we faced an election that tore this nation apart and shocked the crap out of many of us on all sides. And as if that wasn’t all enough, I also observed a tremendous amount of Facebook lash-outs. And with all of these things in mind, but particularly the last one, I write this post.
This past weekend, I attended an SCA coronation. And in the middle of the day at some point as I stepped out of the hall to get some air (as I was starting to feel utterly wretched) a friend of mine asked to speak with me. Much to my surprise, I received a bit of a scolding about a past incident. Given that the incident described was from at least a year ago, I cannot honestly say that I recall ANY of the details. But, that isn’t the point. I trust this individual, and I listened when she reminded me that my words have power and told me that my words have influence on people. Now, I have a confession to make. I have a really hard time taking that last part seriously. Why? Because truthfully, I just don’t see myself as having any more or less say on things than anybody else. I’m just a person – one of many. Why would my words have any more sway or less sway than another person’s? And why should my opinion carry any more weight? But that is just my belief. Who knows? Maybe she is right? So with that spirit in mind, here are some words that I hope we can all carry with us into 2017.
It is time to heal the rifts. People are going to have opinions. And people are going to voice their opinions. For better or worse, I believe that this is one of the things that makes our country great. But an opinion is not a barrier or a restraint upon you unless you – yes YOU - allow it to be. People are going to have opinions about politics, or fashion choices, or religions, or TV shows, or who you love, or what you do on your weekends. That is just a given. And some of those people are going to publicly voice their opinions – social media only furthers enables people to do this. You have no control over someone else voicing their opinion – nor should you, truthfully. But what CAN you control? How you react to it.
I mean seriously – THINK about this. If somebody tells you that you are going to fail at something, I can guarantee that you will – IF you allow that opinion to impact you. Ask yourself something – what is more important to you – someone else’s opinion about something, or your own opinion about yourself? So going back to my earlier point about words having meaning – if indeed my words really do have an impact upon people, my hope is that you take this message to heart. You are important. Your own goals and values and ideas and thoughts do matter. So whether or not I or your parents or your spouse or your neighbors or church members or anybody else around you approve/disapprove or like/don’t like whatever it is that you are doing – that is just an opinion and nothing more. Don’t let yourself be held down by what others may or may not think. Don’t waste your wonderful talent, time and energy reacting to someone else expressing their opinion. Instead, just go do what you want to do and enjoy it.
2016 burned up so much time and energy in flame wars. My hope is that 2017 is spent trying to mend the hurt, come together, and to respect one another. Opinions will still be voiced – no question about that. But how will you react to them? That’s up to you.
In addition to what seemed like an unbelievable number of celebrity deaths one right after another; we faced an election that tore this nation apart and shocked the crap out of many of us on all sides. And as if that wasn’t all enough, I also observed a tremendous amount of Facebook lash-outs. And with all of these things in mind, but particularly the last one, I write this post.
This past weekend, I attended an SCA coronation. And in the middle of the day at some point as I stepped out of the hall to get some air (as I was starting to feel utterly wretched) a friend of mine asked to speak with me. Much to my surprise, I received a bit of a scolding about a past incident. Given that the incident described was from at least a year ago, I cannot honestly say that I recall ANY of the details. But, that isn’t the point. I trust this individual, and I listened when she reminded me that my words have power and told me that my words have influence on people. Now, I have a confession to make. I have a really hard time taking that last part seriously. Why? Because truthfully, I just don’t see myself as having any more or less say on things than anybody else. I’m just a person – one of many. Why would my words have any more sway or less sway than another person’s? And why should my opinion carry any more weight? But that is just my belief. Who knows? Maybe she is right? So with that spirit in mind, here are some words that I hope we can all carry with us into 2017.
It is time to heal the rifts. People are going to have opinions. And people are going to voice their opinions. For better or worse, I believe that this is one of the things that makes our country great. But an opinion is not a barrier or a restraint upon you unless you – yes YOU - allow it to be. People are going to have opinions about politics, or fashion choices, or religions, or TV shows, or who you love, or what you do on your weekends. That is just a given. And some of those people are going to publicly voice their opinions – social media only furthers enables people to do this. You have no control over someone else voicing their opinion – nor should you, truthfully. But what CAN you control? How you react to it.
I mean seriously – THINK about this. If somebody tells you that you are going to fail at something, I can guarantee that you will – IF you allow that opinion to impact you. Ask yourself something – what is more important to you – someone else’s opinion about something, or your own opinion about yourself? So going back to my earlier point about words having meaning – if indeed my words really do have an impact upon people, my hope is that you take this message to heart. You are important. Your own goals and values and ideas and thoughts do matter. So whether or not I or your parents or your spouse or your neighbors or church members or anybody else around you approve/disapprove or like/don’t like whatever it is that you are doing – that is just an opinion and nothing more. Don’t let yourself be held down by what others may or may not think. Don’t waste your wonderful talent, time and energy reacting to someone else expressing their opinion. Instead, just go do what you want to do and enjoy it.
2016 burned up so much time and energy in flame wars. My hope is that 2017 is spent trying to mend the hurt, come together, and to respect one another. Opinions will still be voiced – no question about that. But how will you react to them? That’s up to you.
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This is so timely...
Date: 2017-01-09 08:52 pm (UTC)Re: This is so timely...
Date: 2017-01-09 08:59 pm (UTC)Yes... but no. Yes in that individuals can be talked through the situation and fostered. But no in that there is no one-size-fits-all recipe. For some people, I think they just have to experience enough life (good and bad) to develop the strength and determination to stand up for themselves in such situations.
no subject
Date: 2017-01-10 06:27 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-01-11 01:37 am (UTC)I see you more that you point out uncomfortable truths that need to be expressed. People don't like that. They like to hear confirmation of their own beliefs. They don't like to think about things that are uncomfortable.
However, those things, if we are not to deal with "The Emperor's New Clothes" means that we have to speak up, even when it makes people uncomfortable.
I try to look at it from a "THINK" perspective: Is it True? Is it HELPFUL? Is it Inspiring? Is it Necessary? Is it Kind?
I can be very forceful when I think it's necessary, and I suspect that you are as well. But if we don't speak out, problems happen.
no subject
Date: 2017-01-11 01:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-01-11 01:47 pm (UTC)